Then there was now…..

I woke up one morning and suddenly it was like I had new eyes. My vision seemed to be more crystal clear, and with my new vision came greater clarity. I feel like I’ve lived a life in remission up to this point; always in the process of recovering from something. I’ve smiled and laughed, and danced my way over and around the things that bothered me. I’ve cried silent tears of frustration, and wept with soul wrenching intensity behind closed doors. My life has been idyllic in some ways and painful in others. I’m not sure when it happened but at some point it seems like I was letting my life become all about the burdens I’ve faced.  I was carrying my pain on my shoulders, I had cloaked myself in the protective armor of self-defense. This wasn’t living.

Thirty years of life and all of sudden now I see that my current path is not where I want to be. If I want to be happy I have to make the choices in my life that are going to get me there. Yesterday is gone forever but today starts anew. So my first question for myself is to ask who am I?  There is the girl I was yesterday and the life I was leading…..and then there is now!


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